Are you a Wizard going to the 3rd circle? THEN YOU BETTER GET THAT QUICK CAST FOR 50% MORE EXPLOSIONS!!
Are you a Pyromancer? THEN YOUR HEADED STRAIGHT TO THE ORIGINAL SOURCE OF EXPLOSIONS!! OH GOD KEEP BURNING FLAMMABLE THINGS TO MAKE MORE EXPLOSIONS TO PLEASE OUR GODDESS!!
Are you a Cryomancer? WHAT THE F*** ARE YOU DOING WITH YOUR LIFE?! YOU BETTER HAVE ICE BLAST OR PRAY TO OUR GODDESS TO MAKE THAT ICE SPONTANEOUSLY EXPLODE!!
Are you a Psychokino? MAKE THEIR HEADS EXPLODE!!
Are you a Linker? MAKE A EXPLOSIVE CHAIN REACTION!!
Are you a Thaumaturge? MAKE THINGS BIGGER!! RESULTS?! MAKE A BIGGER MESS WHEN THEY EXPLODE!!
Are you an Elementalist? THEN CHANCES ARE, YOU’VE HAVE BEEN CHOSEN BY OUR GODDESS TO THROW A BIG CHUNK OF MOLTEN ROCK THAT WILL BLOW UP ANYTHING THAT IS HIT BY IT, INTO EXTINCTION!!
Are you a Sorcerer? THEN YOU BETTER SUMMON AN EXPLOSION!!
Are you a Chronomancer? THEN TURN BACK TIME AND WATCH THAT EXPLOSION AGAIN AND AGAIN!!
Are you a Necromancer? THEN COLLECT THE PIECES OF THE CORPSE YOU MADE EXPLODE AND USE THOSE PIECES TO MAKE OTHER THINGS EXPLODE!! ENDLESS EXPLOSIONS!!
Are you an Alchemist? THROW F***ING BOTTLES INTO THAT MONSTER’S FACE AND WATCH IT CAUSE A CHEMICAL REACTION AND EXPLODE!! ALSO!! MAKE THOSE POTION PRICES EXPLODE!!!1
Are you a Rune Caster? THEN USE ALL THAT POWER YOU STORED UP AND OVERKILL MONSTERS SO HARD THAT THEY EXPLODE!!
Are you a warlock? THEN BE THE FINISHER CLASS YOU’VE ALWAYS MEANT TO BE AND MAKE THOSE MONSTERS EXPLODE INTO OBLIVION!!
Are you a Featherfoot? THEN THAT’S GOING TO BE ONE MESSY BLOODY EXPLOSION!! CLEAN IT UP!!
STAY TUNED FOR MORE CLASSES IN THE FUTURE!! MOST LIKELY WITH EXPLOSIVE RESULTS!!
NOW PLEASE OUR GODDESS WITH EXPLOSIONS!!
